Tuesday, June 28, 2011

A Corner In The World


At the age of two he knew,
life was not perfect.
As we walked into our new house,
the smell of fresh paint,
held us in a cloud.
I watched him moving
his fort and soldiers,
his face beamed.
This was our corner of the world,
the nightmares would not seep through,
these walls.
I would not let them enter.
For years I held secrets,
in a bottomless purse that I carried.
As he grew,
he scattered them,
as if they were seeds,
allowing them to be free.
As the bubbles came up from the deep,
we rose above,
and began to breathe.

33 comments:

  1. wow. i think this is one of your best, yet.

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  2. love the journey in this...and the freedom found...

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  3. this was a fantastic read...enjoyed every line - great imagery as well..think that's my fav by yours so far ayala

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  4. Very lovely.. my best lines are:

    As he grew,
    he scattered them,
    as if they were seeds,
    allowing them to be free.

    Happy OSW~

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  5. "For years I held secrets,
    in a bottomless purse that I carried.
    As he grew,
    he scattered them,
    as if they were seeds"
    those who hold and those who release...
    great poem.

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  6. I love that some bloggers apply poetry, and I could see yours. Nicely done.

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  7. Nicely done, the "this was our corner of the world" line really stood out as I read it.

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  8. Beautiful Ayala...I exhaled, quite naturally at the end of reading your poem...feeling the release and then fresh breath filling my lungs again.

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  9. Poignant storytelling, Ayala. Good that you have each other with whom to rise above.

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  10. Beautiful imagery. I felt myself breathing at the end with you.

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  11. What a beautiful story of children their life as they grow and the roof covers home

    Thanks for your one shot support

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  12. Lovely poem, and the ending is magical!

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  13. To rise above with one you love... this is success! Nicely parsed.

    http://www.kimnelsonwrites.com/2011/06/28/the-g-spot

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  14. Not an unneeded word, every one in its place for a poem full of heart and life. I can believe that "the nightmares would not seep through these walls."

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  15. This is so lovely, ayala, I was drawn in to your story until the very end with the bubbles...wonderful ending to this piece!
    p.s.-- that dog brings a smile to my face each time I come here! :)

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  16. Nice imagery Ayala. And I detect undertones of sadness and mystery. It's incredible the stories you can weave with these one shots. Bravo my friend.

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  17. "This was our corner of the world,
    the nightmares would not seep through,
    these walls.
    I would not let them enter." I love your motherly instincts to protect your little one from the nightmares.

    Beautiful imagery.

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  18. You drew me in with the first line...Wonderful Ayala!

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  19. This is one of your best, I think.

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  20. I wish I didn't so well understand this one.

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  21. perfect, flawlwss, beautiful .... it's best to open up the bag and let our pain, sorrows, memories to be free, to merge with the wide ... and we can do this with our loved ones.

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  22. I think you are really growing as a poet. This is deep but not confusing, and so evocative to me. I adopted a little boy at three, from a horrible circumstance. This poem spoke right to my heart.

    The sparcity of words is absolutely perfect....this poem haunts in a beautiful way.

    Lady Nyo

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  23. For years I held secrets,
    in a bottomless purse that I carried...

    Such great lines in a very touching poem.

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  24. Deep in feeling, yet anchored in physical space. Excellent.

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  25. Beautiful in depth of feeling and freedom found!

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  26. The mix of darkness and hope pulls on my heart. Well done.

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  27. Those secrets in the bottom of the purse - wonderful image, wonderful lines.

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  28. A somberness to this piece, really composed perfectly ~ Rose

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  29. Very gentle, but very vivid imagery of pain, protection and, love.
    Enjoyed this very much.

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  30. Wow, Ayala. This powerful poem is both evocative and mysterious. The image that most resonated with me was that of the fort and soldiers - both toys and symbols of protection.

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  31. Life, evolution, freedom, journey- all woven together with so much beauty!
    Undisputedly; one of the bests I have read..

    hugs xox

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  32. This is so beautiful, poignant, heartfelt. Love the bottomless purse line.

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